Relief for Single Moms in Laynee Gilbert’s New Book, So What: A Single Mom’s* Guide to Staying Sane in the 21st Century (*Not just for single moms)
Author Laynee Gilbert combines her experience as a single mom, counselor and manager to deliver a new book for single moms and other parents titled, So What: A Single Mom’s* Guide to Staying Sane in the 21st Century (*Not just for single moms).
This modern day world of extreme multi-tasking and Instant Messaging / Instant Gratification (IMIG, as Gilbert coins it) presents enormously stressful challenges for parents, and especially for single parents. As pressures mount and life feels like it’s spiraling out of control, the natural reaction is to attempt to hold on even tighter to control, then beat oneself up for not being a good enough parent when the illusion of control crumbles.
In So What, Gilbert normalizes these common reactions while at the same time emphasizing the need to lighten the grip on control and forgive imperfection. Gilbert asserts that through this fresh "So What” approach, one can maintain one’s self-esteem and sanity while fostering a strong bond with one’s child.
Throughout the book, Gilbert confronts self-defeating attitudes such as the “perfect parent syndrome”, and expands on the following strategies, among others:
Identify and defuse “buttons and hooks” that magnify challenging situations.
Trust one’s own judgment to determine the right time to say “Yes” or “No”, instead of being swayed by guilt or perceived judgments from others.
Balance the need to control (often motivated by fear) with the need to let go.
Ask for help and take time for oneself without guilt.
Gilbert’s “So What” philosophy is intended to help parents discover and embrace their own style, while greatly enhancing the relationship with their child. Here’s what one mother had to say after reading So What: “So What is the perfect reminder that I needed as a parent. It's easy to get beat down by the day-to-day events of life and lose perspective – molehills become mountains. So What reminds you to keep it all in perspective, lighten up on yourself and maybe even have a little fun… So What is the little angel I have perched on my shoulder now helping me get through the day.”
For a review copy of the book or an interview with the author, email firstname.lastname@example.org